Monday, October 02, 2006

Isn't it funny

How quickly life can change? How in just a single minute, your future will never be the same as the one you planned or thought out? In one short second, you can hold the world, and in the next, it is gone, like a misty dream as you are waking out of sleep. One minute you are on solid ground, and the next, you are on a high wire balancing your family on your head.

And like pandora's box, it can't ever be shut again. You can never go back to that dream once you've woken up. It is like the red and blue pills in that one movie, you know, where he wakes up and finds himself in a different reality, only this one is the "real" one.

There are days when I wish I could go back to my dream world. Days where being a mom is too hard. And then there are days where it feels like being a mom is a dream, and I know that the real world is harsh and cold, and I don't really want to be there.

But these moments of discovery are immanent. These moments happen. You can't control them, they just are. And I guess the bigger question is "what next?". How do you take this new information, this new perspective, and create a new future for yourself?

3 comments:

big d said...

i don't know yet. i'm working on it. we will figure out something...

AJ said...

I hope you are doing ok. It sounds like you have had some big things happening. Hugs and kisses!

Angela said...

It comes with time. All you can do is give yourself time to accept what is yours and prepare to endure to the end. Only you can choose how this new information will affect the way that you spend the coming days, weeks, months, and years. I hope that you find peace soon with whatever you're dealing with. ((hugs))Angela