on his birthday
there are a few memories i have, from being a little girl, that i really treasure. i am sitting in the front of the bluebird candy factory. my daddy brought me there. and i am eating yummy popcorn. i get to look through the ice cream and smell the yummy smells of chocolate all around me. and it's just me and dad. i'm sure we were there for mom, to see her, or to do something for her. but whether i'm just there because he was watching me, or i'm there because i wanted to go, it doesn't matter. because i remember feeling love.
i remember having gone up into the mountain. riding in a big green truck. my sisters were at school. we went up into the mountain to cut wood. i remember riding in the truck next to my daddy. i remember feeling very important. even if i wouldn't go potty in the woods because it was gross. that truck backfired a lot too. it was really scary for me. but it was also pretty cool.
or the time that we went to checker auto parts together. and i won! i won a big bucket full of stuff for cars. how fun for a 16 year old girl. but i still remember that. with a big smile on my face. using that club in my pinto!
my daddy had a way of having me help him. i stood on wood as he cut. that was for the blue boat that he bought. i wanted to name it the "picard" but he didn't. i remember him stripping the closet doors, out by the shed. i remember thinking how smart he was, because he knew how to do that. it involved lots of stinky chemicals. my daddy also built a fence. a long huge fence. because i wanted my wedding reception to be in the back yard of my parent's house, and it needed something like that. it was a big deal. thanks dad. it looked great.
daddy also meant movies. scary stupid movies. the blob for one. i remember watching lots of silly movies that were pretty scary at the time. i also know that because of my dad, i have a love for star trek (see previous post). i also have a deep seated appreciation for john wayne movies. or even blow them up movies.
so besides just saying "happy birthday" , you know, it's been done, i wanted to do something more. i wanted to let you know how much i love you. because you are my dad. you are very important to me. no matter how i acted when i was a teenager.
you instilled in me basic moral laws. that one must be honest. that one must be true to one's self. that we are citizens of this country. that you work hard for what you want. that you take the challenges that come at you with determination. that you don't let anyone tell you that you are not good enough, or not smart enough. that you do what you know is right.
see, my dad is awesome.